*This diary is intended to be an official record for the world as to what is happening to me and my family and what (although unknown at this point) is to be. -- for an accurate reading, please begin with Entry #1*
Claire has kidnapped my son…
The morning after my last post, we had left a motel. While driving toward the next town I told Claire that Michael and I weren’t going to be going to South America with her and that we were parting ways with her and Julian at the next town.
She was very quiet for the entire ride.
When we reached the next town Claire pulled into a service station to get fuel. She said she needed to use the restroom while I unloaded my backpack from the back of the van.
The only thing she had asked me (earlier) was how I was going to get to where I had planned. I told her I was going to walk and possibly hitchhike. One thing I didn’t tell her was my friend (in the city) had planned on driving to meet us since he had acquired a car.
Not another word from her for the rest of the day.
While I unloaded bags to get at my backpack I overheard Julian say something to Michael that made the hairs on my neck stand up. Julian had asked Michael ‘why we had to leave them’.
Michael told him ‘Don’t worry’
Julian said he was scared and told Michael to ‘Make me stay'
Then, as Claire returned from the restroom I heard Julian whisper...
‘If you see my Mom, tell her I miss her’
I paused, wondering if I heard him right. I said ‘Julian, what did you say?’
Julian sat there silent, tears rolling down his cheeks, begging me with his eyes to not say anything.
Claire climbed behind the wheel as I closed the back door to the van. I slung my backpack over my shoulder and walked to the driver’s door window.
I told Michael to get out of the van and just as I was going to ask Claire about what Julian had said, I was staring straight into the barrel of a handgun.
Every muscle in my body froze and my hearing became strangely muffled. I could see Claire’s lips move with a curled bitterness that chilled my bones. Time slowed down for me as I could hear her say “Don’t move Michael!”
Her lips moved again 'You wouldn't understand.'
Then her eyes turned hard as stone. I could see a slight shift in them, knowing in an instant that she was going to pull the trigger.
A reflex kicked in and I jerked my backpack upward, ducking down. The blast of the gun ripped the backpack from my hands as my momentum carried me toward the back, side door. I grasped the handle and managed to yank it open.
Michael had just taken his seatbelt off and I reached for his arm.
But I wasn't fast enough. Claire punched the gas and the mini-van’s wheels churned in the gravel. Michael slipped backward away from me, back into the van as I fell to the ground.
I pulled myself to my feet, ears ringing from the gunshot. I watched in horror as the van sped away, with my son still inside.
I frantically searched around for someone, anything to help. I begged in my mind that someone had seen what happened.
I paced and tried desperately to calm down. I needed to think but my mind raced back and forth to every moment leading up to this.
My body lurched into a run into the direction that Claire drove off to. My heart thumped like a war drum in my head. Rage boiled to the point that my entire being wanted to rip her limbs off, one at a time until there was nothing left. Then my body couldn’t take it anymore. I stumbled to the ditch and stood there, no feeling whatsoever.
I've hitched one ride with a rancher and have walked for miles. I need a car and I’ve tried to get a hold of my friend. I was supposed to meet him yesterday (a days travel from where I am) but I’m guessing that since I didn’t show, he might have turned around and went home.
Hopefully he checks messages I’ve left on his site.
I haven’t eaten in 3 days now.
I can’t think straight
A broken record plays over and over in my head. 'I shouldn't have gone this far!'
I'm doing what I should have done the day this all began.
I'm turning myself in.
this could be my last post.